Life with no parole

You'll probably think I'm a loser for writing an entire post about a TV show. But at this point I feel I have to.

A few weeks ago, Fox pretty much cancelled Arrested Development. Here's the story.

A normal season of a sitcom is 22 episodes. After all of the drama and debate about whether or not Arrested Development would be picked up again, it indeed was.

HOWEVER. We were told it was picked up for 22 episodes. Wrong. Ohhh...how naive I was, as a TV major, to even believe that a show with such bad ratings was actually picked up for a full season.

As with most "questionable" shows (see: Reunion) Arrested Development was indeed only signed for 13 episodes. It was never picked up for a full season. Just for 13 episodes. And trust me, with the ratings it's been recieving, we are lucky we actually got the entire 13. Fox decided (with somewhat good reason, and I'll get to that) to pass on ordering the "back 9." Thus, shortening the season to 13 episodes. Thus, cancelling the series.

So who do we blame? Do we blame the network? Those bastards! Cancelling a show as good as this! I'm sorry, but no. We really can't. The thing is....Arrested Development's ratings have been terrible. Ever since it first started, they have been declining. It actually set a record for the least watched show to win a Best Comedy Emmy. Yes. After the show won a fucking EMMY for being THE BEST COMEDY ON TELEVISION...less people watched it.

So blame goes to you, America. Yes. Keep devouring your trite and bland shows like America's Next Top Model, The OC, and Yes, Dear. Apparently you weren't ready. You didn't need a show as inspired as AD. You didn't want to invest your time and commitement to something. You wanted mental junk food. You wanted something you could sit in front of, enjoy, and shit out 10 minutes later. You weren't willing to give something a chance that required dedication.

Which brings me to this. You people that flat out say, "I did not like Arrested Development. It was not good."

How many episodes did you watch, straight through? Why did you decide that this show was not worth your time?

As I suspected. You probably didn't make it through an entire episode. Not once. And why? Oh. That answer is simple. Because Arrested Development is smarter than you. You thought it was weird. It didn't make sense. Because you, my friend, are what we call a passive viewer. You have can't dedicate yourself to anything. You can't truly invest yourself or your time.

That is why I do not blame Fox for this travesty. For what critics UNANIMOUSLY consider one of the best programs ever, being cancelled. Fox made the right business move. They cancelled a show that was doing poorly.

Because you wouldn't watch it. Because you didn't get it.

Idiot.

I hate you.