AO-etiquette (see what I did there?)

OK, here's the thing...

There are tons of things to do on a computer, aside from AIM. Homework...homework is one of them. Check e-mail. Read a good blog (or just settle for mine). Look at news/sports/weather. Play minesweeper. Play the Sims. Write a novel. Design websites. Make pictures. Look at porn. Upload your own porn.

The fact is...sometimes I might be doing something on my computer in addition to being on AIM. Usually homework. Sometimes minesweeper. Probably not porn because that requires closing the blinds which I am entirely too lazy to do. I can watch all the porn I want at Libby's anyway.

So...doing other things besides AIM. What does this mean to you, my AOL buddy? It means the fact that I am online does NOT mean I am devoting every ounce of my attention to you. It means I am here. Yes. I am available to be contacted. Yes. I will respond at some point. Yes. It doesn't mean that I will, or even can, respond the second you message me. So hold your freaking horses. I hate when I recieve something like this, all within 10 seconds:

NeedyNelly: Hey.
NeedyNelly: Are you there?
NeedyNelly: Fine I guess you are ignoring me. Bye.

Actually Nelly, I was not ignoring you. I was trying to finish a paragraph in my essay. Peace out.

Oh but Steve, why not put up an away message? Wouldn't that be easier? If you're too busy to be talking, why not do the right thing and let people know you aren't available, instead of complaining that people want to talk to you.

I'm not complaining that people want to talk to me. I'm complaining when people expect me to respond faster than you can say "aol face" I hate when the little beep hasn't even finished beeping and already I've gotten "WHERE ARE YOU"

Know what's awesome? The fact that you can now message people while you still have an away message up. Comes in handy. Genius. Yeah I had DeadAIM, you could do it on that, but still. I don't go for the add ons anymore. I prefer my messenger services like I prefer my street drugs. 100% all natural.

Another lesson...If there are stairs. Take them. Now everyone knows it is common courtesy to take the stairs down or up one level. Actually, it's called the "down 2 up 1" rule. Don't take the elevator down 2 flights or up 1. If you do, you risk being gutted and hung in the elevator shaft. "Down 2 up 1" isn't enough for me. I have bad elevator rage. In general, just don't get on after I get on and get off before I get off. That's wasting my time. I'm going from 3-14. If you are going from 5-12, fuck off. Get another elevator I'm not waiting. Sorry you broke your foot, crutches are a nuisance and that cast looks painful. But you're still walking to floor 7.